Decisions

This is the week. By Friday, you should have responses from all your schools. It has been a long wait, and now is the time to take control again and make some decisions. Bear in mind, that in the end, you are the one who will have to live with your decision, at least for the next year.

I have some things I want you to take into consideration:

• Wait list is not a rejection. It means you made the cut, and if they had room, they would have taken you. If one of your favorite schools has you on wait list, consider visiting and pleading your case directly to an admissions officer. Send in an extra recommendation. Write a personal (passionate) letter talking about all the reasons you love that school.
• Go back and visit again. Visiting now is much more important than schoolwork at this point. Colleges look different with an acceptance in your pocket. Your "first choice" may not be as attractive. If at all possible, go without your parents and experience the travel and the college by yourself. You are going to have to get yourself back and forth next year.
• Talk to your Parents about finances. Now is the time to make sure that you take the financial realities into account. Figure out that the unmet gap is, and what will need to be paid back, so you understand the financial liabilities.
• Narrow your list. If you got into several schools, narrow your list down to 2-3. It is impossible to compare more than 3 schools because you will get overwhelmed. 
• Emphasize the positive. This year has been brutal. But in the end, everyone will end up somewhere, and almost 70% of students end up happy at their colleges. If we did our job right, you liked most of the schools on your list enough to attend any of them. So don't dwell on the negative. Those colleges just didn't appreciate you, and it is their loss.

Best wishes for happy visits, and good choices!

March is the LONGEST month

April may be the cruelest month, but for high school seniors and their parents, March is the LONGEST month. The end is in sight for the college admissions process… but it is still a month away. And then, when you do find out where you got in, and where you didn’t, inevitably there will be a wait list here and there, muddying the results. Financial aid packages will dribble in, too, and because each will have its own unique combination of merit aid, need-based aid, and loans, it will be hard to compare to them without a spreadsheet. And don’t get me started on what the stress and anxiety does to relationships within the family!

So what can you do, aside from making time move faster?

1.     Be patient with yourself and others. Spend this month doing things that you really enjoy, that you may not have a chance to do next year. Hang out with friends (but DON’T talk about college). Cook elaborate family dinners, or bake cookies and cakes. Enjoy the gorgeous weather, and spend time doing outdoor activities. Whatever helps you get out of your head, and remember that this, too, shall pass.

2.     Remember that no matter what happens, you can only attend one college (at a time). This is sort of like choosing a romantic partner… there is no such thing as perfect, so you are really looking for a place that you will enjoy, and won’t be sick of within a year. About 30% of college students transfer (for a variety of reasons, including finances) so no decision is final, but given your choices, make the best decision for you, and don’t look back.

3.     Spend some time thinking about what factors are the most important to you… is it a location, a specific major, or some other factor that will make or break your decision? This is a good time to go back and look over your notes, or revisit some of your choices so that you can make the decision easier. Otherwise, plan on spending some time on the road in April, visiting your top choices to make the final decision.

4.     Focus on your academics. It may not seem like grades and scores matter anymore, but they do. Your high school will be sending your final grades to your college, and if your grades drop, your acceptance could be rescinded, or you could be asked to attend summer school (ugh!). Also, scores on AP and IB exams will be helpful to you in the fall, for extra credits, getting out of freshman English, or taking an upper level class.

I wish I could tell you that it will all be fine, and you will get into your top choice school. Sadly, that may not be an option. But I can tell you this: Most students end up loving the school that they attend, and the most important part is the fit, and the affordability of the price tag, and not the name or prestige level. The bottom line is that your education is what you make of it, and you can get an amazing education at any of the colleges you applied to!