Waiting is the Hardest Part

There are several stress peaks during this very stressful year, and this two weeks period is one of them (the other major one is at the end of March).

Acceptances will be trickling in, not just for you, but also for your friends. It is easy to get overwhelmed and depressed and anxious about the news. If you get accepted, you are ecstatic and happily share the news no matter how it will affect your friends and their mood. If you get deferred, you suddenly doubt that you will get in anywhere else. If you are denied... well, it isn't a good time.

So here are some tips for surviving (and thriving) during this very difficult time:

1. STOP TALKING TO YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT COLLEGE. This is especially important for parents. I walked on the treadmill at my health club and overheard 3 separate conversations about college. And in each one, at least one of parents got more and more anxious as they talked. You have plenty of other things to discuss. Be considerate about your friends' feelings and be discreet. Do not post your acceptance on Facebook! (this goes for parents, too!) Wait until May when all the choices have been made, and then you can celebrate.

2. FOCUS ON THE POSITIVES. If you have received an acceptance to one of your lower choice schools (safeties), print out the acceptance letter and post it on the refrigerator or someplace where you will see it often. It may not be your first choice, but at least you are going to college. (For those who haven't heard yet, stay positive, and distract yourself in other ways).

3. LET IT GO. If you are denied, repeat this mantra: "There will be other, better colleges for me and it is their loss." And then let it go. Don't obsess about why it happened. It is out of your control.

4. BE CONSTRUCTIVE. If you are deferred, make sure to update your file with mid-year grades, and anything new that has happened since you submitted your application. You still have a chance, so don't get bitter or obsessive. Send in anything that you think will strengthen your file. Also refocus on classwork and grades. They are more important than ever.

5. DO SOMETHING YOU LOVE. Take time to take care of yourself, and spend time with people you care about. Exercise, eat your favorite holiday foods, and enjoy yourself.

Hang in there... this too shall pass!

20 Tasks Teens Need to Know Before They Leave for College

I recently read a blog that listed 31 tasks that teens should be able to do before they left for college. I agreed with most of the items, but then I realized that I needed to add/subtract/amend some of them. So here is The College Lady's list of what teens should know how to do before they go to college.

In no particular order:

1. Manage a bank account (using a check card, checking your balance, and generally, not going into overdraft!)
2. Pay a bill (either in person, or using a website, or through your checking account. This includes using a credit card)
3. Make travel arrangements (you have to travel back and forth from college, right?)
4. Navigate an airport, train or bus station, take a cab or ride the subway
5. Talk to a stranger, whether it is a cab driver, a professor or the college dean
6. Plunge a toilet (an important life skill)/clean a bathroom (especially after you have been sick)
7. Car maintenance, change a tire, check the oil (especially important if you will have a car at college, but helping a friend out if they need it is valuable, too)
8. Pay for dinner, including appropriate tipping skills
9. Self-prescribe over the counter meds (what to take for muscle pain, headache, etc. without calling Dr. Mom)
10. Call a doctor (knowing when to call is an art, but there are general guidelines)
11. Cook a meal (especially if you don't want to eat at dining services all the time!)
12. Cancel a membership or an account
13. Buy clothes/Return a purchase
14. Pack a suitcase
    
15. Do the laundry/use an iron/sew a button/remove a stain
16. Comparison shopping and staying on a budget when you are buying your own food (using coupons and shopping the sales is important, too)
17. Negotiate a deal (it can't hurt to ask for a discount, as long as you aren't being pushy or obnoxious)
18. Make a bed (impress your roommate or prospective partners!)
19. Enjoy a drink responsibly and know when to stop drinking before you get too drunk or sick (and know how to take care of a sick roommate or friend)
    
20. Say "no" with confidence to roommates, panhandlers and unwanted sexual advances.

Tips to Triumph over Testing Torture!

Pardon the alliteration in the title, but testing is the bane of most student's existence. Even with test prep, it is stressful, and you have to wake up early on a weekend after a long week at school. Sadly, even with the "new" SAT on the horizon, testing is going to be a part of high school life for the foreseeable future. So whether you are taking the AP, SAT, ACT, SAT subject tests or PSAT, here are some tried and true tips to help you get through it.

• Sleep
  Getting a good night's sleep the night before a test is a no-brainer. But did you know that getting a full 8 hours of sleep two nights before is even more important? Your quality of sleep on both Thursday night and Friday night before a Saturday test is critical... it is almost like putting sleep in the bank, so that in case you don't sleep well on Friday, you have enough to make sure you can adequately function on the rest of the previous night’s sleep. The quality of the sleep and the regularity (same time to bed, and same time getting up) also helps you feel more awake on the morning of the test.
• Food
  Make sure you have plenty to eat and drink before and during the test. Pack lots of fluids and granola bars and high protein snacks to keep you going. Stay away from caffeine if it makes you jittery. The same goes for sugar, so you avoid the energy high and then crash that can happen. Students who take tests without snacking show a noticeable drop in their scores as the test goes on... Forget the diet, just keep yourself going for all 3.5 hours!
• Gum, mints or hard candy
  Studies have shown that sucking on mints or Jolly Rancher candies, or chewing gum can increase concentration during a test. Don't believe me? Click here. (http://www.scientificamerican.com/podcast/episode/gum-chewing-may-improve-concentrati-13-03-26/) If one is distracting, or you tend to crunch (which could annoy other test takers) switch to something else. And remember: unwrap before the test begins!
• Visualize success
  Five minutes before the test begins, close your eyes and visualize yourself taking the tests and achieving your goals. Meditation can help you focus, feel more confident, and will help you maintain a positive outlook rather than feeling shaken when you don't know the answer to a question. Check this out: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/04/03/how-meditation-might-boost-your-test-scores/

Good luck with your testing... Once the Test Torture is out of the way, you can move on to the next stage of your college admission process. Whew!